At Home (He Feels Like a Tourist)

So, most of the folks I meet here seem to fall into one of two categories: those who possess a somewhat adventurous experience and those who don't quite fit in at home. OK, more I think of it, perhaps this more of a spectrum, that most folks have a bit of both categories in them. Lucky for me, most people I meet tend more towards the adventurous spirit than the oddball ex-pat. OK, I did meet an odd ex-pat from Northhampton, Mass. last night who spent three years sitting in a beach town, doing nothing, because "life comes to you" but that is separate story altogether.

Every now, however, I meet someone who I honestly can't figure why they are away from home. Unfortunately I have one of these types in my class. I'll call her Sarah, to protect her identity and to protect myself, just a little. Sarah is an American in my class and yes, she is the bane of my existence at present. She is from New Hampshire. She is maybe 26 years old. One day, during a class break, she dissed Vermont, remarking that Vermont is home to rampant polygamy. Um, what? I mentioned that I had never come across that in my time there and asked where exactly this was happening. She answered that it was a statewide reality. We have been slightly at odds ever since. She clearly did not like my challenging her in public, but honestly, it sounded ridiculous to me. And I hardly wanted people from other parts of the world registering my lovely Vermont in their minds as the degenerate, backwards state...especially from someone from New Hampshire! She said she read about this problem in her hometown paper... well, OK, that does make sense. Only a local New Hampshire paper is going to report on rampant polygamy in Vermont. Yeesh.

OK, so, yes, Sarah is trouble for me. She is going into a prestigious International Relations program in the fall, to study peacekeeping. Not sure about the fit there. She is here with her nice boyfriend to learn Turkish, though it sounds like this move isn't altogether necessary. Now, why is she the bane of my existence? Well, she struggles with the language. That is, of course, no problem whatsoever. We are all visibly struggling and we all make really big mistakes. Turkish is full of opportunities to make huge mistakes that are quite embarrassing. Using the wrong vowel sound can lead you to uttering some rather rough profanities. So, mistakes in class are hardly a problem.

What is a problem is that this woman has some seriously negative energy. Not a day goes by without her whining, honest to goodness whining... about how hard the language is, about how much she doesn't like being in class. She expands this negativity to remarks about how dirty Istanbul is (it isn't really, though the air is polluted), and anything else along those lines. Every time she answers a question in class, she laughs nervously and can barely finish her sentence. Again, that is just fine but there is a meanness to her that is not OK. She laughs at her boyfriend when he makes mistakes, which luckily he rarely does. She pouts her way through class and seems altogether miserable. She is such a distraction that I try not to look her way or react to her. I am hoping to not reinforce her negative drive for attention.

Trust me, I realize that part of the problem is that I spend four hours every day in a small room with the same eight people. At this point, I know what to expect from all of them. Three of them I just love - the Italian anthropologist, my good friend who is Dutch, and the hilarious Canadian guy; the others I like just fine. Then there is Sarah. I have noticed that, in general, the Americans struggle the most in class, and seem the most uncomfortable learning. Perhaps this is because we don't learn languages as readily in school. I am not sure that is it. I feel like there is something else going on here. I don't remember being put in situations that made me feel OK in making mistakes in public. I think, perhaps, we are conditioned to be really uncomfortable in making mistakes and struggling publicly. Plus we often make fun of each other. Maybe that is it? I don't know. Today, sadly we signed up for the next class today, and yes, it looks like I will have another month with this woman. Ah well, I realize I really need to not spend my time on this. Hey, maybe she is just an outlet for my own frustration. I don't know.